> Recent Entries
> Archive
> Friends
> User Info

June 11th, 2004

10:43 am - 9 Days Well, I have been in MN for 2 weeks now. My time here has been exhausting, rewarding, frustrating, exciting...basically all of the above. I am preparing for my trip(which leaves in 9 days) nearly around the clock. Any moment I have free, I shuttle down to the cities, where my Grandparents live. This results in a lot of driving, and a lot of stressful planning. My crew is better then I ever hoped for. We are an eclectic mix of quiet and loud, under and over acheivers. I probably fit into the quiet overacheiver catagory. Not one girl has irritated me yet...except the one I'm here with...an amazing feat for 9 teenage girls around each other almost constantly. I"m really nervous about the actual trip...my head starts pounding when I even think about it. It's not that I think that I'll fail...I just have worries that won't stop nagging. Although I love my crew, I still worry about truly fitting in with them. I just don't know if my personality will drive them crazy after 2 days. There has been no indication of this so far, but it's still hovering in the back of my mind. I seem to have trouble fitting in wherever I am, so why should this be any different? I know the answer to that...we all are working as a team, and each of our well-being determines everyone elses well being...but I'm still having trouble believing that. I'm also nervous about the homesickness factor. I feel it now, and I can talk to my family every night. What do I do when I can't? When I'm alone in the wilderness with these girls...compleletly cut off from my life at home...for 4 weeks? I don't know what I'm going to do. But I suppose those are hurdles I'll jump when I get there. Until Soon ME Current Mood: nervous Current Music: I can actually hear the squirrels and the birds :)

(Leave a comment)

May 22nd, 2004

02:26 pm - 6 days Wow, 6 days from now I will head out to MN to train for an insane Canoe trip I'm going on with a close friend of mine. On June 20th we'll leave MN for a month in Canada...deep into Canada...500 miles into Canada. There will be 7 girls my age, including me, and 2 guides who are both sophomores in College. During the 4 weeks before hand, we will plan our course, go through training, pack our food, and even make our own beef jerky. My Grandma is going to paint my paddle with a beautiful painting I found on a wilderness site. It has trees, and the outline of elk in a fog. So beautiful. I'm really excited, but really nervous too. All in ALl, I'm going to be away from my family for 8 weeks...a long time in my eyes. My friend is even more nervous though. At least I have Family in Mn, she has never even been there before. Changing Subjects: My family is driving my crazy. My Dad got married in november, so I live with a new stepmom and step sister who's 4. Dad and my Stepmom seem to "disagree" a lot, which makes it stressful on me. my stepmom will also protect M from anything...which often splits our family into two camps...the old and the new. I truly hate this, for I just want us to be one family. Not two. Frankly...I'm looking forward to an 8 week break. I'll miss the people..but not the insane environment around here. Current Mood: restless Current Music: the sound of "Lizzie Maquire" from the TV

(1 comment | Leave a comment)

April 11th, 2004

03:01 pm - Happy Easter! Ahh, isn't it ironic that on the day we celebrate new life I start a new diary? No? Well, I think so. I'm in San Diego today, and quite enjoying myself. The weather is beautiful, and heck, I get to go to Disneyland on Tuesday! My best friend lives here, so it's great to spend time with her too. I called my family after church, and they were quite talkative. My little sister, who's 4 was the only one who didn't have lots to say. I'm sure she was completely focused on her Easter basket at the time, so I'm not taking it personally. My grandparents are in town, and they both enjoy talking on the phone, but my grandma has a cold, so I didn't have to talk for long. Don't get me wrong, I love the whole lot of them, but seriously, I'm going to see them tommorrow. We went to Shadow Mountain church for services today. What an ecclectic mix of styles! There were hymns, organ music, and rock music all rolled into one. I suppose they have to please the old fogies and us young ducklings all at once. I'm sure greatful I don't have that job! Current Mood: content Current Music: Air1

(Leave a comment)